Let's Talk About Sex.

Last night at around 11.30 we had a blackout. It came as a surprise (I mean there was a bit of rain but nothing to suggest we would lose power) and Biggest Miss and I were moving furniture, well a piece of furniture. It is not uncommon for me to move things around at any time of the day. This time was because it HAD to be moved.


 I have had the thing for years and it has sat in our 'hallway' for months and just never seems right, besides it was just a dumping ground for items that didn't need to be there. It had a printer, a red tub of books, my stamp album ( I have been looking for that) and two baskets with my 'tools' in it. I use the word tools lightly. There was eight screw drivers, none of which have ever been the right size, a hammer, a Stanley knife and a shifter ( I have never used it but My Beloved ALWAYS uses his sifter so I figure they are useful). I did find all those paint brushes I bought three weeks ago though. There was also some tiles and wood glues and a whole packet of Panadol.

Normally I'd move it myself but as most of the kids were asleep I didn't want to make any noise. I asked Biggest Miss to help me she agreed as long as it could be done in the 'Adds' she was watching a movie. Eventually the Add came on and we moved it towards the back door (it is in the skip bin now). Just as we put it down the world became dark and I mean so dark that you could poke yourself in the eye and not see your finger!

'No body move.'I said calmly as I always do when there is a black out after dark. Luckily Littlest Miss and Mr Cheeky were asleep in their beds and Miss Thinker and Miss Independent were also snoring. If they hadn't then the routine would have been to get everyone to say their names and starting from youngest to oldest we would 'collect' them into the lounge room where either Biggest Miss or The Man Child (definitely NOT a fan of the dark until the last couple of years) would have felt their way to the candle and matches stash and have a few candles lit, sat in front of a mirror of course. The night would have then been spent reading one of my many Enid Blyton books I have had since I was a kid.

Instead everyone seemed to forget that they had phones (with built in flash lights) in their hands and let me trip up down the hall ( I had yet to actually put the stuff that was on the hall table away before I moved it) to get some candles and then all the way back to find some matches. Finally when the light of the candles flickered on the ceiling and walls in the lounge my eldest two 'darlings' started to play games on their phones.

'You know,' I said 'I could get a book out.'
'Mum, we are teenagers.' Biggest Miss said in disgust and The Man Child just grunted in a not very interested way at my suggestion. Little Miss who had actually managed to fall asleep began snoring  and I was thinking that it was the perfect time to see how my biggest two babies were doing in general.

We spoke about all sorts of things and then we got on to the topic of sex. The Man Child immediately got agitated

'Oh for god sake mum! I am going to my room!'

'What?' I asked

'I do not want to have this conversation with you!'

'What? I just want you to know you can talk to me about these things that is all!'

'Yeah. Good. But I wont. EVER.'

'Ok. Just so long as you know.'

'Stop talking about it!' he said and went and sat at the dining table. Biggest Miss and I continued chatting for a bit then she pulled out her phone and played a game. I sat on the lounge not far from either of them remembering all the black outs we'd had in the past from summer storms and how we'd spent that time listening to stories. When the power finally came on an hour later they went to bed and I tidied the hall, but only because My Beloved would be home before the sun came up and I was pretty sure he didn't want to trip up over everything whilst trying to get to bed, other wise I'd have left it till the morning.