Big Miss is now in High School, so anything I say about her will have to be run past her for sure. She does, of course, have a life. As any teenagers will tell you, parents are embarrassing ( apparently I am particularly embarrassing) there are so many things they say or do that are suddenly horrifying for a teenager.

 Even just driving past a group of their peers can be enough to have them diving to the floor. I am not even joking. That actually happened once. I was driving Aliesha and her friend past the local high school one morning in our old van. The special school bus it had been dubbed affectionately by all. I looked in the rear view to see two teenage girls quite literally on the floor. Despite my demands the get in their seats immediately they stayed there until we were well past the school. I expect the same sort of thing from Big Miss now she is a 'teenager' (today, actually).

I remember when I first started high school. I was so excited! I got up at five that morning, I couldn't sleep with excitement and I was showered, dressed and ready by 6. That was probably the first and quite possibly the last time I was up so early and ready for anything! Big Miss has naturally been in and out of her uniform a few times over the holidays. She is happy with them. Shoes however, have been a source of great distress all holidays.They have to be Black.

The school has been quite adamant that only black shoes will do. I have even received text reminders about the imperitiveness of this shoe colour. That is not the issue, the issue is I refused to buy Converse hi top shoes. So I bought those hideous black leather school shoes. THAT was the issue.

"Mum, I am NOT wearing them."

" I am not spending 90 dollars on shoes love."

"Mum everyone has them."

"I am sure not everyone has them."

"Yes mum, EVERYONE has them."

"Then it looks like you'll be the only one who doesn't." I'd say and continue with what ever it was I was doing. Big Miss would walk off, protesting all the way out of ear shot.

 Naturally I am not completely heartless and I did have plans on buying her the shoes for her birthday. Luckily for me I went to the local school to pay fees and grab a couple of school issue shorts and I saw black hi top shoes for sale and a third of the price. I bought them instead. I continued to let Big Miss believe that her world would end when she went to school in those shoes I had bought earlier. Because I am am just a LITTLE bit heartless it would seem.

Today she received her birthday presents and the shoes were even better than the beautiful silver jewellery box she had been given.  The shoes, though they were not Converse, were at least from a distance a dead ringer. That was acceptable. The socks I had brought earlier in the holidays were not. They were white. They HAVE to be black now, apparently.

Oh well, you win some and you lose some I guess!


Anyone else with a kid in the first year of high school , be it yr 7 or 8? How have you found the preparations? I especially want to hear about the complaints! I dont want to be alone!! ;)

Biggest Miss Graduates

My Beloved and Biggest Miss and I getting some photos taken before the Formal

.

Well it happened. Biggest Miss, now known as Aliesha has finished school AND moved out. That is for another post however.

Some shots before the event.

The arrival.

Aliesha's formal partner Nathan and his parents Graeme and Suzie without whom Aliesha's formal arrival and pre photos wouldn't have been so awesome. Graeme and Suzi own A CHEVY Experience and were very generous in allowing us to have A Chevy experience all of our own! Check out their facebook page to find out more. I am giving them this  'plug' with out their knowledge as a way to say thank you for helping to make Aliesha's formal so wonderful!

My Beloved's little bro Billy was graduating as well and this is the only picture I managed to get of the two of them. They stopped by our table to deliver their certificates to us before heading back off to enjoy their night. We were joined by My Beloved's father and Step mum for the evening and friends of Aliesha's parents as well no photos of them sadly, not because they dont exist but because not many were taken and those that were were taken whilst blinking. ;)

Aliesha and Billy finally graduated and done with school!

Aliesha is going to do a Diploma of beauty this year at Tafe and plans to work  but 'not at Maccas' on her 'gap year' as we are calling it. Well done Aliesha. Your father and I are so proud of you. The sky is the limit! xx

The Granny Flat

I have been absent for some time now. Doing things like dealing with two weeks of school holidays. Normally I love school holidays. But these past two weeks have not been fun. Not for the kids and not for My Beloved and I. We have been working and slaving.

It started when I couldn't take my Beloved's complaining about our sleeping arrangements. Being the oldest of five kids and growing up not to far from where we live now I know how important it is for you to have your own space as a kid, especially when there are a few of you. My Beloved on the other hand grew up in suburbia, the oldest of two kids and  therefore doesn't have a bloody clue! Well, he doesn't!.

'I am sick of our bedroom being surrounded by kids.' was the general complaint, it was worded differently depending on what was or was not happening at any given time.

'The kids HAVE to have their own space love.' I'd say.

'So do we!' he'd whine.

'We DO!!' I'd counter and so on and so forth.

Finally I snapped.

'RIGHT! You want a room not surrounded by kids? Then you need to build the granny flat.' I said.

'That would be great but I dont have the time.'

With three jobs and our two business ( still working at the tour business) he was not making excuses so I couldn't say anything. Though I did. ;) Coz that is how I roll.

'Well of it bothers you that much you'll have too find time or shut the hell up!'

Yes, I know. I should have been better than that and just been 'supportive' but I do hate people whining at me. ;)

One night after he had left for work and Big Miss had spent all day rearranging her bedroom into a 'mini' bedsit type deal ( though minus the bathroom and kitchen) I sat down and thought about how I could give everyone what they wanted without having to pay someone else and for that matter without it costing a small fortune.

It was not long after that I had an ingenious idea. IF we could somehow turn what is currently an old piggery but long used as a shed into the guesthouse I have always wanted it to be, we could get The Man Child and Big Miss out of the house ( and that bloody pool table taking up space in our lounge room). Which would mean we could reclaim our old Bedroom ( i.e the biggest in the house) and everyone still gets their own rooms.

'I am a genius!' I proclaimed to an empty lounge room. No one is ever around when I have genius moments or when the house is immaculate, both of which don't keep me up at nights, but it would be great if just once, someone other than the pets  were around to witness it!Then, after my self-congratulatory rush I realised we'd need to buy doors and window and more bricks and tin for the roof and, well lots of stuff. I was a little annoyed at how not genius I had turned out to be.

Because I do love a good daydream I decided to pretend we had all the items needed and I'd just plan it all regardless. Which was the smartest thing I could of done because I soon discovered we had two windows and a sliding door that could be moved from the current placement  ( in our house) and use them in the granny flat. That did mean some bricking up would be required and as luck would have have it could also mean we could 'brick up' a fire place in our bedroom ( where one of the windows is currently 'living'). I was a genius again and I knew that My beloved would be seduced not only by having our old room back but also by the fireplace idea. It was doable!

I waited til he was home the following morning and I hit him with it.

'OH MY GOD ADAM!' I sort of shouted at him. 'I have had  THE MOST ingenious idea!!'

'Sure!' He mocked me, laughing. 'I'll be the judge of genius around here.' he added smiling.

I told him all about it and dragged him from room to room selling the idea. I ended with the icing on the cake, the fireplace.

'Of course, with this window gone,' I said as his eyes glazed over with an 'oh my god that is a LOT of work' look 'We could replace it with a fire place! A Fire Place!' I said again.' Imagine going to sleep with a fire going, how romantic.' I said nudging him suggestively ( hey what ever works!!) he laughed, but I knew I had sold it!

'You know,' he said to me ' I do actually have enough tin to cover the shed...'

'YESSSSSSSSS!' I shrieked. ( I get excited easily it seems.)

We have been planning, discussing and even started doing some of the requirements towards turning the shed from, well, a shed to a basic but fully liveable granny flat. There is no plumbing going in, I figure I'll be assured to actually see the bigger two that way, because everyone has to use the toilet and bathe after all!

Stay tuned for more. I am soooooooo excited! :D

The Man Child pulling the old rusty tin off the shed roof. One photo for now...
I want more work to have passed before I bombard you all with pics!

A Milly moment, hypochondria and nicknames.

There is always a hypochondriac in every family. The extent of their hypochondria usually differs one family may have someone who checks themselves in to the hospital on a regular basis another family may have one that freaks out a little about something. When it comes to choking I am the freak the hell out and worry about how stupid you look later kind. I am not even the hypochondriac in our family. Little Miss is. She has cemented her place in that role over the years for a number of things from a small mossie bite (that was a little red) making her 'so incredibly itchy' to a splinter, so small I still question whether or not it even existed, requiring a dramatic 'get it out, get it out'.

Last week however was a classic 'Milly Moment' and has been the source of entertainment for the Man Child ever since. It has also been the source of more dramatics for Little Miss. It started, like most things do around here, with everyone playing outside while I was drifting between putting clothes in the dryer and washing machine and folding and putting clothes away.

"Oh mum" came some sobbing far off in the distance "Oh MUM, MUUM, MUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM." the hysterical cross between a scream and a cry was coming closer and I started running outside. Oh my god I thought what has happened.

"WHAT? WHAT"S WRONG???"

"MUUUUUUUUUUM I have rabies, I have rabies, ohhhhhhh no I think I have rabies!' Little Miss sobbed and stopped running she stood on one leg holding the other with tears streaming down her face. I stopped worrying after I heard the word rabies.I knew there and then it was just another Milly Moment.

"You don't have rabies darling."

"What happened?" I asked looking at her ankle that aside from some moisture and some dirt on it, it looked to be in damn fine shape.

"We were running. We were playing tiggy and (sob) and then (dramatic breathing) the dog bit my ankle (talking, breathing and sobbing faster) and there was all this foam stuff on my ankle (starts crying again) and now I probably have rabies!!"

"Mill, trust me, you don't have rabies."

By now the kids had made their way up from the paddock and  Littlest Miss had been woken by the commotion.

"She is fine mum." The Man Child told me laughing " They were chasing each other and I was mucking around with the dogs. Buster grabbed her ankle and she looked at him then started screaming about foam and how she had rabies. It was so funny."

"Shut up Ashlee!" Little Miss cried. " It is not funny!! I could have rabies."

"Oh my god" the Man Child said, "you think you have rabies... that is the first sign of having rabies!!"

"Ash." I warned

"It is not funny when someone has rabies!" Little Miss cried as she ran inside to wash her ankle.

" Don't Ash." I told him as the girls started talking about how funny it was. Later that night as we all sat down for dinner the Man Child who was in a jovial mood started to annoy his sisters, Little Miss as usual took the bait and began to get up set.

" Calm down rabes." the Man Child joked.

" DON'T CALL ME RABES!!!" Little Miss yelled

" Oh NO, mum, I think Milly definitely has rabies... getting in a rage from a simple comment is the second sign..."

All week at some point in the day someone has referred to her as Rabes. At first she was upset but now she realises that if she does not want to keep the nickname for life she had better not react. Turns out the kids have nicknames for each other that I had never previously known before they are as follows

Little Miss - Humpback your dads fat. ( though now it has been replaced with Rabes)
Miss Independent - Skelator
Miss Thinker - Pimple Bum
The Man Child - Chubby
Big Miss -Freckle fart from Kmart ( but she decided to try and start a new name of Goldielocks, it just doesn't have the same ring to it does it?)
Mr Cheeky- Devil
Littlest Miss- Brat ( though Miss Thinker goes further and gives her entire nickname- Annoying little brat child)

How is that? What horrible siblings! Though they do all assure me they are meant and said with love! Must run in the family as My Beloved's nickname ( that I call him) is fat boy .Mine is  unknown because as he told me I call you a lot of things, just not to your face ;)  Sadly I'd better clarify he is more than likely joking OK!

Mother Quotes and Us

I was reading a post at Psychology Today after Google searching for Mother quotes, it popped up and I found what I wanted a list of quotes, about mothers to help me write this in between getting breakfast ready, kids dressed for school and dropped off and finished before I go to visit my mother for a few hours this morning. So a little ten mother quotes and how accurate they are, in our family. You will note there are forty others I didn't bother reading or read but didn't want to actually put all that much though process into the post so ignored.

#1 A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. -Tenneva Jordan

This is very true in our house and it extends further than pie, it goes all the way to cakes, pastries, lollies, ice cream even dinner items if someone has burnt or not put enough on ( doesn't happen often but when it does I wanna cry.) It does not however extend to chocolate. NO NO NO!

#2 A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. -Peter De Vries

The older my kids get and the more of them we have the truer this becomes. We are not even suburban we are rural. Sympathies accepted.

#3 Some mothers are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together. -Pearl S. Buck

I am the queen of scolding lately, in fact I tend to scold more often than not but when I do breakout the kissing god help those little and not so little tackers I could just eat them up they are that damn cute!

#4 All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his. -Oscar Wilde,The Importance of Being Earnest

There is a big part of my mother in me, but sadly an even bigger part of my father, much to everyones chagrin  But the real tragedy of this is that Big Miss is every ounce her mother... I really feel for her future husband, I do hope he is secure in his manhood and has a great sense of humor!!

#5 Any mother could perform the jobs of several air traffic controllers with ease. -Lisa Alther

This strikes me as particularly true at any moment on any given day, except shortly after waking... every plane would crash and burn if I was in control of the skies... of course I wouldn't personally be comfortable with a air traffic controller's only qualification being a mother, as there are times mothers lets something 'drop' ( well I do anyway) for the overall good and knowing my luck I'd be in the plane that dropped.

#6 Grown don't mean nothing to a mother. A child is a child. They get bigger, older, but grown? What's that suppose to mean? In my heart it don't mean a thing. -Toni Morrison, Beloved

Yes this is very true of all parents I am sure. I don't care that two of my kids are either a year older than I was when I had the Man Child or a year younger, they are my little kids and always will be. Hell, I still feel the need to remind the Man Child to wash his face hair and bits every time he walks towards the bathroom... If possible I'd still dress Big Miss in frilly dresses and a nappy... the older she gets the more I wish I could!

#7 There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Any mother who says the above quote is not true, is lying through her teeth. Full stop. End of discussion.

#8 When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway. -Erma Bombeck

This one is very apt when it comes to me. They are called lectures by the bigger two but they will be listened to and they will be absorbed, if for no other reason than they know damn well they will hear the advice and reasons ( good and bad) over and over again, until they obviously have learnt from them.Because that's how I ( mothers) roll.

#9 Mothers are all slightly insane. -J.D. Salinger

Ain't that the truth? 

#10  By and large, mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless class. -Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Ditto.

Well i managed to finish this between getting breakfast and driving one lot of kids to catch their bus, the other three have  15 mins at best to get to school before they consider themselves late which I think just proves how true #5 and 2 are, also, possibly #9. Time for me to tidy up this god forsaken mess and visit my mummy. Have a great day!

The New Adventure

My Beloved has been thinking and talking about starting a new business in the Tourist Industry. You see we began our concrete garden edging Business ‘Kerbs’ when we came back from Western Australia it was flourishing and doing well, then I got pregnant with Mr Cheeky and Littlest Miss. I couldn't work any more and you do need 2 people to do a good job. So for two years nothing happened as we stopped advertising . My Beloved asked a taxi driver one day whilst he was out how hard it was to become a driver and then he set about doing what needed to be done.

Around the same time he also approached a tour company  about a job doing ‘Tag-a-long’ tours of Fraser Island and he got a job doing that three days a week. Because he loves the beach, camping, fishing and meeting new people it was perfect for him. He’d wave goodbye Sunday night and be home by 8 the following Wednesday night. But there were things he’d do differently he said. He’d focus more on the spots the locals knew and loved and less on the tourist stops. He’d also personalise it more. So he asked me to start working out a website and find out what he needed to do to get into that industry. Like the awesome wife I am I have been doing it for him and it seems that the right time to take slightly bigger baby steps is now…. Wish us luck!

I have added a link to our Kerbs Facebook page so feel free to ‘like’ it for us. As we will still continue to carry out  that business  as well with the Man Child helping his father, instead of me. Until Littlest Miss is in school of course, luckily for me that is still four years away. Phew!!

While you're liking things you can checkout the Facebook page if you have not already. My7LittleAustralians   but ONLY if you want too. If you scroll to the bottom of the homepage here on the blog you'll find a Pintrest widget that I added yesterday it can take you to the Pintrest boards I have up. If your into that sort of thing!  I am considering myself a computer genius as a result ;)  Actually it is all thanks to Code It Pretty  a great blog that explains in really easy language how to use code and CSS in your blogs websites etc.

The Idiot Box

We have been TV free for the past three (or is it four?) days. I blame ‘progress’. Even before the analogue free to air TV channels were phased out or switched off depending on who you ask, the digital TV reception was crap… at best! We didn’t get two channels and a third was constantly flickering and teasing us when ever we tried to watch sporting events, delusional that this time we had a chance at actually seeing the thing.

Last week the TV started to flicker and then freeze and then lose all signal for the day. THAT is really bloody annoying. But it would come good again and all would be forgiven. That was last week. This week we have ZERO signal. My Beloved, Little Miss and Mr Cheeky were the most effected by the sudden switch off of moving pictures transforming them from functioning humans to deaf and not, at times, to far from drooling zombies.

The rest of  us managed OK. During the day light hours, for me however the real torture happened at night. After I had the kids in bed and done what ever it was I had to do…. Why?  I sleep with the TV on, turned down almost inaudible but it MUST be on. This terrible habit first started when we lived on the other side of Australia. We shared a house with my parents and brothers whilst we were on our ‘working holiday’ though really it was a working holiday for all the adults except me I was the housekeeper. If that makes you think it wasn’t all roses and sunshine then you must not realise that the pay off for that was free baby sitting.

When ever I wanted or needed it. Up until then I had on maybe four occasions done something child free. I also had not had My Beloved home every night or every five nights for many years. ( I was used to doing everything and not getting a break from the kids. It was fine by me too. I am not complaining. It has its benefits and the main one was total TV programme control after bedtime and truth be told before bedtime to if I wanted to).

The only downside for me was our bedroom had a TV and after everyone toddled off to bed each night My beloved would watch a movie and I would have trouble going to sleep. Eventually I had no trouble and that is when the real trouble began! Fast forward 2 years and if anyone so much as dared to turn the TV off in the middle of the night on their way back to bed after getting a drink or midnight snack i would wake up shortly after with a fright. It didn’t seem ‘right’ as I was so used to the TV droning away in the background it’s silence would be quite literally deafening.

So this week I am sure you are starting to imagine was rather difficult on me. The first night I lay in bed for three hours staring at the ceiling unable to sleep. I think my body clock was set at ‘bedtime  is when the TV goes on’ and not at a normal ‘when you are tired’ pattern. the second night I had extra teens sleeping over and they kept me up til two. Well not really, but because I had no drone of the TV I got to listen to their chatter and most of it was either completely inane rubbish with words like Yolo and OMG spoken as a word!!!  ohemgeee ( Is that even normal?) Or just utter tripe. The amount of time I heard ‘Cool story bro’  or ‘Do it again and see what happens’ astounds me. Surely you only need say that once, then the next time show them what happens? Anyway I digress.


I finally fell asleep an hour before My Beloved arrived home from his night shift driving taxis and  when I  was woken an hour after that I was harassed for ABC 4 kids by Mr Cheeky I had to suffer what is best described as ‘kid show’ withdrawals. It sucked. For us both! Eventually My Beloved woke up and he tried everything to fix the problem. He even bought new connections, a set top box and a Blu-ray player ( I do not really know why) it was second hand and did not have a remote, which explains it 20 dollar price tag but not, My Beloved’s difficulty in not understanding why we couldn’t watch anything on it (besides the fact we own 1 Blu-ray disc and probably a  million DVDs.) it turns out the Blu-ray movie he brought gave you the option to chose the language it played in and the machine was very sure that pressing play is not the same as pressing ok!

The fact our DVD Player has been playing up (after years of hard work) sent My Beloved in to a ‘I will fix this if it kills me’ frenzy and before long he was on the roof fiddling with the aerial and booster box attached to it. He even climbed up a tree and cut branches down (that was a positive as the leaves were really clogging our guttering) and still no signal. Then for a very short moment in time we had 93% signal and things were looking up. Then nothing.  I didn’t get to witness that as I had taxi duty with my bigger kids that afternoon. My Beloved cracked it and said ‘That’s it no TV! I give up.’

‘The problem in in the wiring in the wall.’ I said when I got home.
‘What? It can’t be! It is the aerial, it has to be.’ he said looking out the door at the aerial above. ‘Stupid bloody digital TV'.’ he muttered
‘It is in the wall.’ I said. ‘Trust me, you have replaced everything else!’
‘It can’t be!’ he said ‘Nothing can get into it to do anything to it.’

No I thought, but that rough tug I gave the connections the night the signal was lost probably has a lot to do with it.


‘It is definitely in the wall.’

 

I said. ‘Trust me, I know. Call the aerial man.’ It must have been how I said it or the look on my face because he stopped and looked at me and said.
‘WHAT DID YOU DO?’
‘I MAY have bumped it, a little too enthusiastically.’
‘Well you could have told me that!’
‘I didn’t get a chance!’ I said.

And I didn’t… honest.

1 down 4 to go

If you missed my last post 5 things I really want to finish fortnight. ( Even if it kills me!) Then this random coupling of photos may make no sense especially since I don't plan on saying too much. I have an open can of blue paint and a child's bedroom to 'beautify'.

             The dining room is finished ( OK besides a TINY bit along the top) I have tweaked the picture so the

             pattern stands out. Obviously i have no imagination and blatantly copied the pattern in the picture 

             below. They do say however, imitation is the most sincerest form of flattery, or the most annoying, 

             it depends where you you stand. ( yes i added that last part!) See the two paintings? Big Miss 

             painted the top one and the Man Child the bottom. I don't need to buy art prints when they do such

             a fantastic job. Wouldn't you agree? 

 My Inspiration 

(image source) How gorgeous IS this?

5 Things I really want to finish this fortnight. ( Even if it kills me!)

So for those unaware I have turned 35. Yay me! I also have been spending weeks doing some painting. I have painted tiles so that I can finally get the kitchen splash back in place… I have half finished. So that is my number 1 top priority.  All of my finish this fortnight list is painting related!

#1  FINISH THE KITCHEN SPLASH BACK WOMAN! ( a good four days required)

#2 FINISH THE DINING ROOM FEATURE WALL WOMAN! (it will take half a day at most)

#3 FINISH MISS THINKERS BEDROOM FEATURE WALL! (or at least the background colour)

#4 FINISH PAINTING THAT REALLY SMALL SECTION OF CORNICING I MISSED ABOVE THE PANTRY (it really is only 15cm long and possibly 10 wide, why  didn't i do it in the first place???)

#5 THAT UGLY WALL IN THE BATHROOM, IT MUST BE PAINTED. ANY COLOUR! I DON'T EVEN CARE WHAT. ( except for brown,yellow,green,black,red,purple…)


Oh and finish Miss Independent's name on her bunting and the gold (all the white,except the bunting) if possible!!

#1 Miss Independent's wall needs her name finished and the odd 'girl' painted on then it is completed.

#2 This is the best shot of the dining wall, I have a small section on the other side of the glass slider to do.

#3 There is no shot of my sharing the rest of the kitchen in photo as it looks so bllllllllllah with the tiles showing up just how yucky it is! Sorry! ;)

#4 The start of Miss Thinker wall and below the picture that inspired the idea. No credit though as I have none but will be searching for it later today.

* Catch up* Blog Everyday in May #14 Ten Things That Make You Really Happy.

Now I am not going to say rainbows, puppies and unicorns because they don’t. Actually rainbows do. They are so pretty. So I’ll have to make that one of the ten. As for puppies, they are cute and stuff, but they yap and chew things… I have small children… I don’t need a puppy doing that stuff too! As for unicorns, well they are not real so i feel like I’d be totally wasting my time adding them to the ten things.


1 My kids make me happy. They really, really do. Even when they are driving me up the wall they make me happy ( after I have given myself timeout).

2 My Beloved  makes me happy.

3 Seeing people get something they have always wanted or worked really hard to get. I am always genuinely happy for them. It is a great feeling to get something you have always wanted and an even greater one to something you have worked hard for.

4 Talking to people that you have heaps in common with, In my case someone I can have a great conversation with when we both have completely different points of view and the conversation seems like a full blown argument to eavesdroppers but it so totally is not. That is awesome!

5 My house and garden, even in it’s ‘This place will never be finished’ state I love it. I love winter for the chance to garden without sweating to death, getting heat stroke or bitten by snakes.

6 The kids bedtime, it makes me happy for a number of reasons, mostly because it means I get some peace and quiet.

7 Planning and then ‘doing’ what ever project I find myself doing, it is an added bonus when I get it finished too (I am the Queen of unfinished projects taking months sometimes years to get completed).

8 Horse riding, though I have not ridden in years!

9 Sitting on the veranda with My Beloved, when there are no kids around.

10 RAINBOWS!!

* Catch up* Blog Everyday in May #12 What do you miss?

I didn’t give this one too much thought, I just thought I would, in list form, jot dot down the things I miss. Nothing too deep and meaningful here.

1. I miss being able to sit down all day on the weekends and read, like I did when I was still living in my parents house. I never really appreciated the luxury of that.
2. I miss Choo Choo bars, Fag lollies ( now called Fads, if indeed they still make them) and Black Cats ( a liquorice lolly in the shape of, you guessed it, a cat.)
3. I miss My Beloved walking around in his Surf Lifesaving shirt. Mmmmmmm
4. I miss our friend Dave, he was many things but good value and a good person. 
5. I miss The Man Child and Big Miss as little kids. I actually is sad kids have to grow up.
6. I miss ( now this is gonna sound unbelievable) the years when we had not put the ceiling in the house and we had to sit around the fire during winter because it was so damn cold, though it was glorious in summer. It was such a simple, but lovely time.

*updated* It was bought to my attention in the comments that the above may have some people concerned... we are owner builders and in the first years we had a roof but no ceiling (plasteboardr/gyprock sheets between us and the tin roof above). It was cold in winter and beautifully cool in summer. 

1. I miss my box of books I’d kept from my collection when I was younger, the same box My Beloved accidentally ‘burnt’… yes, BURNT! What a monster. (Remind me to post a bonfire story here one time.)
2. I miss having bonfire nights
3. I miss… no that is it. I don’t think I miss much else.

*Catch up* Blog Everyday in May. #11 Sell yourself in 10 words.

Ten words starting now:

I am me, genuine, loyal, kind, smart, forgiving, passionate & loving.

There is a flipside, but I wont go into details as I am meant to be selling myself here.

Blog eveyday in May #13 A Public Apology

I am not one for issuing public apologies, I'd rather just express my remorse to the person affected. So this one is a little difficult. I decided instead to try to be slightly humorous and apologise to my husband for all the comments of how amazing I am.

Darling
          I am sorry that when we are out working with sand, cement, hoses and mixers, burrows and shovel and spade that people stop to marvel at the 'lady over there'. You know the one who is putting all the mixes in and pushing the wheelbarrow ( unless it is up a hill or really really full), who is running back and forward mixing up the colour and getting sprayed with droplets of black, terracotta or red oxide, whose hair is all over the place and whose face looks like someone has had a fit trying to apply camo face paint.

I am sorry everyone comments on how amazing that is. I am sorry that after telling them how many children we have they go on with such awe about it, that you feel the need to say "I have 6 (at the time) kids too!". I am sorry that on that really, really, really hot day the owner of the house brought an umbrella over and stood next to me with it to shade me. Bahahahahaha do you remember that? It was so funny! After thanking him and assuring him I was OK you said " Bring that over here if you like, I am fairer than she is and turning red.".

I am sorry that on my facebook page I dont take photos of messy stuff, but take photos of stuff I have just completed. I am sorry that you think  people assume our house is awesome, everywhere... though I am pretty sure they do not. I am sorry I took a picture of our kitchen sink, with the dished piled up, promising I'd post that one, just for you and I didn't. I am sorry that friend of ours gave you a lecture about how great I am when you had a whine about my bitching the other week. Even though if we were being truthful she is a good judge of who is being the dick. She has known us since the beginning and says it straight. I am just lucky I was being awesome most of this time.

I am sorry that when I come home from somewhere without him Mr Cheeky runs up and says " Oh Mummy I missed you so, so much!" but that when you come home he says " Hello, Doodlebum."  It is actually your fault. You laugh at him. I am sorry that people that say I am awesome, don't get to see me in the mornings, before my coffee and someone asks me to think. I am sorry that on the odd occasion people do get to see me wake up I have actually been left alone to wake up properly and I don't turn into an awesome bitch.

But we both know you think I am awesome, so I don't see what the big deal is! Oh I get it... you want people to say you're awesome too. I'll do it. I am sorry that people do not realise how hard you work how awesome your clients/customers in the taxi's, for our business and the tourists think you are. I am sorry people do not realise what an awesome father you are. I am sorry people don't get told how much of an awesome husband you are ( even though you can be an awesome pain in the arse too).

I am sorry that when you go away to work our bedroom is usually in a different room or has been rearranged. I am sorry that when you have been away and come home I have new and even more awesome than the last plans for us to do to the house. I am sorry that I actually let you know when you do something dumb I should just shut my mouth, right? ;) hehehehehe I am sorry that they do not make a national Adam is Awesome Day... they really should, shouldn't they!

Well, that will do. love your remorseful wife xx

Love Letter

I have always wanted to leave the kids little notes. I saw the idea somewhere, years and years ago and thought how wonderful it was. I have  written a few letters over the years to the kids with the intention of when I die they get to read them then. I don’t know why, it just seems like something I think I’d like. If they do something amazing or not so amazing and they get in trouble I'll sit down and write them a letter it usually starts with do you remember when *this* happened?  It always ends up being a long letter a mix of I love you and this is why I said/did/think this, etc etc. But I never get to actually leave notes (well maybe a handful of times) for the kids.

So tonight after they went to bed and just before I did  I wrote the older five a note each. Just a four line note telling them that I loved them and thanking them for my Mothers Day presents. They all get up before the sun and before me and My Beloved (tomorrow at least as he is sick and does not have to work) so I placed them on the dining table, where they will find them they can have an I love you message before I am awake. If not I'll pop them in their lunch boxes as a surprise (or embarrassment for the Man Child, possibly) at school.

My letter writing set,  and flowers just some of my Mother's Day gifts from the kids.
 My Love Letter in an envelope waiting for the kids to find and read tomorrow morning.

I’ll do it more often I think. It doesn’t take that long to do and it is the little things that count. Sometimes the little things mean so much and I am hoping this will be one of those things.

Night

# 8 Blog everyday in May - What advice would you give someone

'Ooooooh goodie! A housewife with 7 kids dishing out 'advice'. This will be worth the read.' Is what I imagine you'll be thinking about now. Fear not! I have a tendency of giving good advice, just not always being able to follow  good advice myself. Especially if the advice offered is in response to something that really has me fired up. I tend to get all 'passionate' (according to my mother) or 'flip out' (according to My Beloved) about things and react first. Well, that  used to be the case but as I get older I have learned it just is not worth getting so outraged at stuff because, quite frankly counting to ten and taking a deep breath or two is a good idea and I think I am getting too old for that shit. So that would be my first piece of advice  Do not sweat the small stuff! Oh and don't forget to breathe deeply before you do say anything...

• Never assume lightening hitting a tree and blowing the fusey thingies in your electrical items, will be an obvious reason to your husband as to why your television does not work.

• If you have kids ALWAYS keep 'spare' things (clothes, shoes, bags, boosterseats, chocolate,) in your car, you will need them just hopefully not all at once!

• When you have made absolutely no effort what so ever before leaving the house because you are just 'dropping' or 'picking' somebody up, do not assume every bodies stares mean you must look alright for a change. You DO NOT. Check the crotch of your pants, also consider checking your head for decorative googly eyed head bands and for god sake make sure you washed off the face painting/make up you and the kids thought would be fun to do that day. SERIOUSLY!

• Always remember if you and your husband decide to do something, anything  and the kids are asleep the more risque that something or anything is, is equal to the odds you have of one or more of your children waking up. e.g 1 Eating ice cream.... you'll probably get away scott free. e.g 2 'couple time' the more one or both of you are enjoying yourself the higher the chance of a child suddenly ( and silently like a ninja)  standing behind you in what ever room of the house you are in.

• The above advice probably makes you think that seeing as I am meant to be dishing out good advice I'd suggest you get a child free night (bahahahahahaha) that would be bad advice... unless of course you want to fall asleep shortly after sitting down on the lounge and not waking till morning.

• THE best bit of advice I can think of however really is take peoples advice with a grain of salt and do what works for you.

Day 10 Blog Everyday in May- Most Embarrassing Moment/s

I’d like to start by saying how much I have healed from what was the most embarrassing and traumatic experience for me. It actually took me 10 years to stop physically shuddering when ever I thought of it. True story! The very fact that I am sharing this with people who I do and do not know from all over the world should tell you that I have moved on. So feel free to laugh your arses off at my expense. It is OK. I can handle it.

I’d also like to add that ALL my embarrassing moments have been a wardrobe related malfunction ( or in this case partially wardrobe related). All have had something to do with the nether regions. Lets ponder that for a moment. Hmmmmmmm lets not.The MOST embarrassing moment of my life occurred when I was 15. It lasted for at least 10 hours and just got worse and worse and worse until I finally got home,fell into bed and managed to fall asleep. Oh sweet relief. Then of course I had to wake up and go back to school the next day.

It began the lunchtime of the day we were off to go via a bus, with every student in the dance and drama classes in my high school to Brisbane.We were to watch some famous dance company preform a contemporary dance about something. You will have to forgive me as most of that 10 hour period I have blacked out, except for those parts I really, really wanted too. You know, the MOST traumatic bits.

The embarrassment started fifteen minuets into the 10 hours. It was of course my wardrobe choice. We were told, and I do remember this bit CLEARLY, ‘to get very, very dressed up.’ my friend Sam and I took that seriously and we put A LOT of thought into our outfit choice. Mine was a red mini dress,a navy blue sports jacket ( OH SHUT UP, I WAS A TEENAGER!!!), black tights and black high heels. My hair and make up was not quite as ‘evening’ but less IS more you know!

We left the school toilet block and started what I have forever more termed ‘the walk of mortification’. To set the scene you need to understand every student in the school, aside from the kids in detention or the library (so my friends) were seated in the area I had to walk. With in seconds the entire area erupted into wolf whistles and calls of all sorts. I was embarrassed straight away. But with a head held high and a don’t give them the satisfaction attitude I managed to walk half of the way to the meeting point. Then I dropped my bag.

Without thinking I bent down, legs straight to pick it up. The whistles and calls erupted again and I just wanted to sink into the ground. But instead I quickly straightened up and tried to continue, in heels the rest of the way, without breaking into a crying run. I finally made it into the sanctuary of the school office only to see everyone except my friend was wearing some kind of denim outfit. “OMG I AM WAAAAAAAAAAAY OVER DRESSED” I thought completely forgetting the embarrassment of ‘out there’.

Now I had the different kind of embarrassment of a hundred of your peers, teenage female peers no less, smirking to each other about my outfit choice. I briefly considered faking some kind of terrible illness but I realised that wouldn’t work so I’d have to stand tall and pretend it didn’t bother me at all. Not long after I managed to gain my composure and ignore the sideway stares the Deputy Principal came up to me and said ‘That is an interesting choice of dress Emma, where is the rest of it?’

‘What about her!’ I wanted to scream and point to my friend who was also wearing skin tight clothing that was too old for her. But I didn’t because that would not have been very nice. Finally we made it to the bus and safely arrived in Brisbane two hours later. Ok so I imagine you thinking ‘yeah that would have been embarrassing but come on THE most embarrassing thing to EVER happen?’ and I would say to you ‘I am not finished yet! It got worse and worse and worse remember? I said that up there ^.

So where was I? Oh that’s right, the ‘it got worse’ part. After walking past a million people pretty much all of who at least slightly noticed my over dress and terrible wobble that can only come from wearing a pair of heels that are too damn high and exasperated by the fact that I had actually never walked in heels before. We finally made it to the venue and we walked up the stairs to then walk down more stairs to get to our seats. Naturally I fell down three stairs and knocked two people over.

THE CALM BEFORE THE REAL STORM

I obviously did not pay any attention to the dancers and spent the whole time wishing that we could just go home. I really was starting to lose my ‘I can do this’ attitude. Finally it was over and time to walk to the food court ( of where ever the hell we were), that was great because that meant that we had 30 minutes until we could board the bus and go home. hallelujah!

 I was feeling buoyed by this fact and I knew I could deal with it. I could make it home with out breaking down. I ordered my favourite dish Mongolian lamb and rice. I chatted with my friends and I was starting to feel better. Soon it was time to board the bus and we were off. My friend needed to use the toilet and was directed to the back of the bus. I sat awkwardly silent til she returned and we chatted for twenty minuets. Then the first of the searing pains gripped my stomach and I fought off passing gas.


‘Oh no I can not fart on this bus,’ I freaked to myself. ‘NO! I will hold it!’
Then another pain and another shot across my stomach and knew what I had to do. I had to use the toilet. '

‘Shit.’ I said, out loud this time.

‘What’s wrong?’ Sam asked me.

‘I need to go to the toilet.’

‘It is back there.’ she said to me.

‘I know where it is,’ I hissed at I her ‘I NEED to go to the toilet.’ I said to her again.
Sam laughed a little nervously for me and said hesitantly ‘ It is fine, just go and wait a few minuets before opening the door.’

‘Ok, good idea.’


I walked from the front seat of the bus to the very back and closed the door. I knew straight away from the explosiveness of the call of nature that everyone in at least a five row radius had heard something. Finally I felt safe enough to leave the toilet and quickly opened the door and closed it behind me. It didn’t help the “Oh my gods’ and ‘ ewwwws’ were barely audible and the smell had beaten me to the front of the bus.

‘Kill me now.’ I thought and I sat there strangely happy that the pain and urgency I was experiencing had gone. That relief lasted ten minutes and it was back. Finally I could not hold off any longer and I had to walk back up the bus. ‘Oh here we go again someone’ said as I closed the door behind me. I came out again with my head low and quickly  sunk into the seat and just wanted to die because I felt the pains again and I had to go back.


‘Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo’ I cried inside my head and I stopped listening to the murmurs and whispers of my bus full of peers as I walked back up the aisle for the third and not the last time. The walk on two other occasions I have managed to black out but the sixth and final time I will never forget because as I got up to go EVERY SINGLE PERSON on the bus let out an involuntary ‘Oooooooh noooooo, not again!’ If I could have, I would have sunk through the floor of the bus and never been seen or heard of again.


But I couldn’t and twenty minuets later we were mercifully back at the school and I could see my father standing at the designated pick up point. I stood up before the bus had stopped. I was standing at that door itching to get out. Nobody chastised me, no one gave me a lecture about standing on a moving bus. I now imagine that both the teachers and the bus driver on board were either really glad I was getting off or realised that I wanted off and I’d probably claw my way out of the windscreen if I had to.

My father was standing at the door and I said ‘Oh thank god you are here dad, I have never been so happy to see anyone in my life. Please lets just go home now.’ and I walked off to our car. I didn’t say good bye to anyone I just left. If we spoke on the way home I do not remember as I spent the whole trip remembering and cringing at all the details of the day.

 The next morning  I suggested I didn’t want to go to school.
‘Oh don’t be silly.’ my mother said to me and that was the end of that. I went to school and suffered the jokes and the stares and pointing, But it was nothing, NOTHING compared to the bus trip home the night before.

I'll catch up with the other days I have missed over this weekend. But in a strange way i am glad my computer and I became friends today because day number 10 was part of the reason I liked this Blog everyday in May challenge. I guess you know you are completely over something like that when you can happily blog about it! Now if you have something more embarrassing than that LEAVE a comment, I want to hear it! :)

#7 Blog Everyday in May - What are you most afraid of?

There is one thing that truly terrifies me and that is losing my children.That includes any of they ways you could lose a child, through death, through drugs, illness, arguments, through marriage ( of course you don't lose your kids once they are married but they are not wholly yours any more, well not as far as their partner is concerned,  So in light of that I should also add I am afraid of  being a monster in law ;) though not really as I won't be ).  I don't even want to talk about it. 

10 Random Things About Me.

I'm on a roll today/night so I am posting again. *Somebody stop me*

I am liking the idea of these list posts. So here I go. 10  random things  about me.



1)  I wanted to be either a Spy, a Nun or an Archaeologist,  actually I thought being all 3 wrapped into one  would have been the perfect cover and heaps of fun. 



2)  I collect stamps. I know nothing about them.  I collect them none the less. They are pretty.




3)  I can ride a horse with the best of them... well maybe not the best of them... I can fall off them like a pro as well.




4) My all time favourite movie would have to be Gone with The Wind or Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. It depends on my mood. 



5)  If I could travel back in time I'd go all the way back to when all the Ancient Wonders of the World were still standing.



6) If I have had a real shock you'll hear me say 'Cor Blimey' with a strong English accent... completely my mothers fault!



7) My idea of a great day would involve total access to the National Library (anywhere) and just soak up the history to be found there.



8) Probably wont be too surprising considering number 1 on this list, I really, really want to go on a archaeological dig and I don't really care where, though any where in the Middle East would rock. 



9) I LOVE the movie Lemony Snicketts -A Series of Unfortunate Events and use a few lines from the movie regularly, namely 'I'm sorry. I don't speak monkey.' and of course when ever someone knocks on my door ( and I know them) I always say 'Intruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude'. I also really wish that someone would ask me to take in orphans just so I could claim my intention to' raise them as though they were actually wanted.'



10) I can not go to sleep unless the TV is on. I fall asleep with the news and wake up with it. I never used to be able to sleep with the television on but whilst we lived in W.A I would fall asleep with My Beloved watching movies, usually horror ( I DO NOT WATCH HORROR MOVIES UNLESS THE SUN IS HIGH IN THE SKY AND WILL BE FOR HOURS AFTER IT HAS FINISHED... yes I am a sook.) and as a result I wake up with cold sweats if I can't hear the dull drone of the television.

#6 Blogging everyday in May- What do I do?

OK then. That is pretty simple to answer really, I mean I could ramble on with the whole, personal manager, chauffeur, cook, washerwoman, camping victim, slave, sex goddess, stuff but I wont. Instead I can sum up what I do into a sentence, albeit a long one.

“I do my best to raise 7 decent, caring human beings, who will be able to contribute to the world in some way, whilst being a loyal and pretty awesome wife.”

As far as I am concerned I get an A+ for my efforts on all counts. There are days I am not such an awesome wife to be sure, but those days are usually the same days my husband is annoying the crap outta me, so fairs fair I say.


I will add that My Beloved would describe what I do something similar to this. ‘Emma is a crazy person who finds more and more things for me to do around our place and spends a lots of time on that damn computer! She is a good mum and a good wife, when the dishes are done.’ then he’d get a slap from me and he’d laugh.

What gives me comfort about not having answered with some in depth, soul searching answer is that I once listened to a guy talking about ideas to make the world a better place, and he suggested that every person who could not say what they did in one sentence was part of the problem and one of the reasons the world ain’t as great as it could be. So I guess I just scraped in to the category of not ‘being the problem’ and that has gotta be something too!

Day 5 of Blogging Everyday in May- Declare your love for a bloggy friend.

For starters I only know one blogger personally and that blogger is a he. My Beloved would not like me declaring  any kind of love for him ( pretty sure his wife wouldn’t either ) or anyone else ,so I am publicly declaring my admiration of said Bloggy friend. I have known this bloggy friend and I use the term ‘known’ quite loosely, as in I have been aware of his existence, since I opened a bank account when I was 16. Since then I have only really  known him as ‘ Bruce from the bank who has lots of kids too’. 

I am of course talking about the unbelievably talented, Biggest Daddy Blogger in Australia ( you know which account to put the money in Bruce ), who also happened to be featured, along with two other Daddy Bloggers on Australian primetime TV a few weeks back. In fact if you enjoy my blog or hate it you have him to thank.

You see it was only after reading his blog posts with interest that I even thought of this whole blogging thing. I thought, ‘Hmmmmmmmm, that looks like fun. Might give that a go.’ Granted I am not a ‘I am going to blog and become a millionaire’ kinda of blogger, i am quite happy spewing forth what ever pops into my mind and just hitting publish kind of blogger ( the kind that doesn’t go far, but that is fine by me) and we all have him to thank for it. So THANKS BRUCE!

If you have not already checked out his Big Family, little income facebook page or the BLOG itself than you do not know what you are missing. It is a humorous and well thought out blog ( he is one of THOSE bloggers). Filled with his family of seven children’s antics and his gorgeous and talented wife Tracey, who is responsible for our header pic, you can check out her other awesome pics on her facebook page Tracey Devereaux Photography.

One of the highlights of Bruce’s blog is his BIG on Kiva monthly posts. Where the family takes it in turns to decide what small /home business in an impoverished country they will loan 25 dollars to, in order to help that particular person make their families lives better. That is a wonderful thing to do. I can not forget the BIG Recipes section either! So if you have never heard of this blog or blogger you should  do yourself (and lets face it, him) a favour and check it out. You have to read the Bio while your there!

Geeze, Day Five was a breeze, I think I am getting the hang of this everyday thang!