10 Things I Love About The Man Child

#1  I love that he DOESN'T care about what people think. I love that he can don the 'Bob the Builder' backpack of his baby brother and walk up a SAND DUNE in full view of other humans singing the theme of the cartoon because he THOUGHT it was funny... others not so much.


#2 I love that he is POLITE and kind and sweet.


#3  I love that he has such a great sense of humour and can take a JOKE. I like that he takes after his father.


#4  I love that he pulled the laptop apart because he truly BELIEVED he could figure out how to put it back and it would work!


#5  I love that he LOVES animals. He gets so cranky when he hears about animal cruelty.


#6 I love that he TOLERATES his sisters who harass him something chronic.


#7  I love that he does NOT care about what is 'cool and fashionable', I really love that! Not a sheeple... mission accomplished! HALLELUJAH!!


#8  I love the way he keeps his mouth shut due to respect when 'OLDIES' tell him stuff he thinks is a) nonsense b) NONE of their business c) just plain dumb.


#9   I love how when I REMIND him to wash his face as he walks to the bathroom he gets SERIOUSLY annoyed. mwahahahahaha


#10  I love that he talks (& swears) in his sleep.



There are three things that would have made it onto the list instead of some that did. But I am not ALLOWED to... I love that too!

Ten Things I Love About Him

What are the things you love about your family? This week I have decided I will think about them all and narrow it down to ten things.

My Beloved

#1  I love that silly giggle he gets when he has said something 'naughty'. He doesn't know he does it and I love it.

#2  The way he wakes up at anytime and tries to sell me something, asks me really weird questions like 'Where have all the women gone' or 'Where is the bus of terrorists?'.

#3  The way he totally gets that 'my' babies sleep with me. 

#4  The way he sticks to his principles even when I totally disagree and argue with him because of it.

#5  His work ethic. The fact he has one, not because he has 'lots of kids' but because he has one.

#6  His Self Control. The fact he can be so calm and collected with situations and people that I would have completely lost it over.

#7  His sense of humour. His quick wit and that he can make me laugh and laugh and laugh.

#8  The fact he does what he says he will do and sticks by it when it matters. If he makes a promise he keeps it. He doesn't make many but when he does it can be depended on.

#9  That nobody 'knows' him like I do.

#10  That he would do anything for me and our kids. That I can trust him completely with everything that counts in this world.

If at first you know you wont succeed, do it anyway!

Today, in order to keep my hands busy and because I have spent the last two if not three weeks stuck inside due to the rain we had been having, I decided to start staining the outdoor table and chairs. Ignoring the fact I didn't have enough stain left over from my cupboards project I started staining a chair. 




'Hmmmmm. What do you think?' I asked My Beloved

'I think you should do the washing up.'

'No, I am serious.'

'So am I' he said.


I ignored his attempt at humour, even though I hadn't done the washing up by that stage of the late morning. (Yes Mum, I know...) I was now caught up in what I knew was doomed for failure because I would run out of supplies. I still didn't care. I was, at this point, unaware of just how 'rose' Rosewood actually is. In the sunshine at least, inside my cupboards it had a dark slightly purplely red tinge, in the sun, well...

Before

Oh dear... this might not
such a good idea.

What a shock I got when the stain
was on the chair.

'This isn't what I imagined.' I said to My Beloved who was looking at the
chair as though something had crawled up and died on it.

'That looks crap' he said helpfully. 'It looks Mission Brown' he said. I turned to look at him as if he had been drinking

'Um it is PURPLE not brown!'

'Looks brown to me' he said.

Umm no, there are no
glamour shots when it

comes to D.I.Y.

2 down, 4 to go.

After two chairs the clouds started to roll in. Miss Three months decided to wake up and Mr Cheeky decided getting his arm stuck all the way to his shoulder in the umbrella 'hole' of the table was just too much fun to resist.

'They get it from you.' My Beloved said as I whinged at how annoying it was having to stop just as I was getting a rhythm happening. Turns out he wasn't just sitting around bored waiting for me to suggest things he could do. No, he was 'doing' something too. As always my response to anything he says that I don't like was 'Whatever!'  Once all the hullabaloo was over with I started on the table (I should have just done another chair).

I did say a light
sand.

Over due for a
sanding.

I lightly sanded it, very lightly as I only had a half worn out 'fine grade' paper on my little sander. It also doubled as a sleeping aide for Ava and she fell asleep next to my work area (don't worry all you OHS freaks she was safe from all dangers) lulled by the drone.

Ooooops, should have
just done another chair!

And that's were it happened, I run out of stain.... so now I will wait till I buy some more. But I feel I achieved something and that quite frankly, is all that matters!

                                            

Careful what you wish for... you just might get it!

So a strange thing occurred tonight. I managed to have a soak in the tub without any harassment... kind of made the whole thing boring really.

 I mean how do people sit in a tub and wash their hair relax, with a 'conditioning pack' (conditioner running down their face and into their eyes) whilst they contemplate the day and the one coming? Without asking small children to get out or without having to shout over the sound of the latest Disney Channel's singing sensations TV show, to shut the bloody door after someone has finally cottoned on to the fact that they really do mean get out and it is not actually 'Mother' for stay and ask questions please!

My Beloved's mother called it her 'holiday'. Every night she would relax in her bath with candles flickering and I assume lights off for half an hour. When ever her kids would come to the door she would simply say 'Mummy's on holidays' and then relax back into the warm water and bubbles. Sounds perfect doesn't it?

I have discovered that in my house at least ,the IDEA of a relaxing bath is actually far more wondrous when you don't get one! It was so alien to me that I felt naked, well, you know what I mean.

Today is day one of the hell that is My Beloved quiting smoking. Now I could go on about how glad I am, but it would be a lie I'm afraid. For purely selfish reasons I must admit.

You see, I smoke too. I have cut back already today as I wont smoke in front of him or around him just to make it easier for him. But the problem is he is ALWAYS around me! Normally not something I would complain about (which should be obvious by the amount of kids we have) but today everything he did annoyed me. Everything he said irritated me. Every time I looked at him fighting off an urge to smoke I wanted to throw the packet at him and say 'Just have one!!!!'.

But that wouldn't be right, supportive or kind. So instead I went out of the house to hang out washing or 'tidy' something when he was inside and inside when he went outside. Not exactly very loving towards My Beloved I know but hell he was ANNOYING! Snapping at every remark I made, snapping at me for snapping at him.

Of course it could also be because I know we both should quit anyway. I am being 'forced' into it by circumstances, which when you think about it is a GOOD thing but it is going to take me a day or two to 'get with the program' then I will be fine. I just gotta do 'it'.  My Beloved and I don't drink (Well, he does. Socially. Which is 2 a fortnight lately.) I do when I am not pregnant, breastfeeding or looking after kids which means the last time I had a  drink was nearly five years ago. So smoking is our only 'vice'.( Oh well, I guess we better find new ones...I pick shopping!)

Since his ulcer that is it! No smokes, No alcohol/fizzy drinks, No 'yummy food' as Miss Thinker calls it. He has to do it and I have to help him and really, myself as well. So this will be a bit of an unhappy household for the next few days whilst we kick the habit.

Wish us luck!

Say what? What we wanna say.

As I feel I started to rant a bit in the post about rude and stupid comments parents of large families hear. I thought I would lighten it with a list of 'we wanna say' responses.

 Dont worry I will have someone even if it is just me laughing by the end. But Just before I do I shall be up front and say. I have heard or read these responses from other sufferers It is not just my own 'brilliant mind'. There are even t shirts you can buy with these sayings as well.



Dont you know what causes that? 

 *  'Yes it is brought on by the very presence of morons. As soon as I leave the house I realise I need to get back to my husband and try for the future of mankind to 'breed' the idiots out.'   

      

     

*  'Yes. And I don't wash my husbands undies with mine ANYMORE.'

Are they all yours?

*  'Quiet you fool, my husband is listening'


*  'Yes they're all mi... wait where did that one come from?'

*  'No they're not all mine. I just gather the neighbours kids to  go shopping.'

*  'Yes and i have more at home/school/somewhere.'



How many kids do you have anyway?


*'Dunno.'


But you're stopping now right?

*  'I dont know. we are only half way through the Karma Sutra.'

*  'Of course! I mean, having as many as I do is perfectly fine. But to have one   more? Total insanity!!!'
   

*  'Well, we do have one more seat in our van...'

*  'No, we will stop when we get one we like/ who is ugly.'

*  'No i make beautiful babies, whats your talent?'

*  'Lots of kids isn't for every one. I mean some people just shouldn't
     reproduce.'

*  'Oh no way. We aren't stopping till we get our own reality show'

*  'NO. We are collectors.'


Dont you have a TV?

*  'I you think TV is better than sex.. well I hate to say it but you're doing
     it wrong.'

*  Yes, and a DVD player...


You've got your hands full dont you?

*  I'd rather have them full than empty.'

*  'Congratulations as the ten billionth person to make that witty remark you are a winner! I'll let you live.'

*  'Yes I have my hands full and my heart to.'




We know what you two have been doing!

*  'Oooooh busted!'

*  'Oh thank goodness... then you MUST know whats causing it!'



The earth is over poulated enough as it is


*  'Well you better not have any.'


*  'We're not trying to over populate the earth, just out number the idiots.'


I'm glad it's you and not me


*  'I am glad it me and not you too!'

*  'Yes, you dont seem like you'd make a very good mother/father.'


You have too many children

*  'OK which one should I send back?'

*  'My children will be funding your retirement.'

*  'Oh I missed the memo where that was any of your business.'


I feel sorry for you/ poor you

*  'Thats funny, I feel sorry for you!'

*  'It's no sacrifice to be surrounded by people who love you.'



If you can think of other comebacks for these questions staements leave them in the comment box, as I am sure, parents of large families would love to hear them. Keep it clean though please anyone can come up with obsenities. We have all thought of those comebacks before.

 See below the link for some of the T shirts as well.

http://www.cafepress.com/evilgeniusstore/1225539

'Keep medicine out of reach of Adam'

In our house the
medicine is locked away
from My Beloved for
very good reason.

Unfortunately for My Beloved he received some very bad news last night... for all of us. Especially me. You see he has developed a stomach ulcer. It is due to his  stress, the very occasional rum and my cooking... that, is according to him.

Of course I think it is due to his poor diet, tendency to become convinced 'we are all gonna die' if there is not a lot of cash in his wallet,his occasional rum, two sugars in his coffee, on his Weetbix and just about anything else he eats (I wont even start on the salt!!) and the millions of Bex and Vincents powders he used to pour into his system when ever his head,teeth or body hurt.

In our house the medicines are locked away, from HIM. He, like a lot of men I hear, suffers from pain soooooooo much worse than any other person on the face of the planet. A headache, toothache or body ache is reason enough to have at least three paracetamols,ibuprofen,aspirin ( or what ever is on offer really) at least every four hours. Until a few years ago this was a typical 'ache' response

'Where are the -insert over the counter pain relief here-?'

'Where they always are?... Why?'

'I have a terrible -insert body part here-ache.'

'My poor baby' I'd say and pass him the pack.

He would take three out and then take about five minuets to swallow them. Usually, and not because, as he suspected, I was evil, it would be the ordinary size tablets. After a few 'terrible aches' I started to buy the gel caps and smaller capsules because 'my poor baby' cant swallow the tablets. - insert eye roll here-.
 After one particularly bad toothache (and on this occasion it was bad enough to go to the dentist after two days of rolling in pain.) I was told about a liquid kind of pain relief called Pain Stop. I brought it and apparently it worked not all that well because he drank the whole bottle in that two days, well nearly all!

I decided that clearly the man could not be trusted with medication. So it became very apparent that I had to treat him like a child when ever he was ill otherwise he may just have no internal organs left functioning. I would have to get the medicine out of the box and bring more water than required because some times he may need a second try at swallowing the thing - insert another eye roll here-.

So it came as no surprise to him or me that I received the call at 9 o'clock last night that he had been booked into the hospital when he finally  did go to the emergency room. He had had too many rums (for his stomach, which since the ulcer popped up last January is exactly 2 and no more!) whilst he was guiding the backpackers around Fraser Island last week.

He took a bottle instead of his usual six pack. He didn't drink the whole bottle, I mean that would just be unprofessional. But he didn't stick to the '2 and no more' rule I had imposed after the first 'ulcer incident'. So by Friday he had 'intergestion' by Saturday morning he was unable to sleep. By Saturday afternoon when he left home to pick up the taxi he was hunched over the wheel.

'Stuff the taxi tonight, let the drunks walk home.' I said

'No. We got your GE bill to pay this week'

'Sorry whose GE bill? I'll have you know that YOU wanted the surround sound system, not me. And excuuuuuuuuse me for needing a fridge!' ( yes I get defencive, I mean who doesn't??)

'No we need the money'

'Not as much as we need you' I said. 'Make sure you go to the emergency room if it gets worse OK? There is no point in you killing yourself or your passengers because we like the sound of Twister in full Dolby Digital.'

He drove off and I knew he'd have to go to the doctor as he was in too much pain. So when he rang at 9 I was not surprised but was very worried. My drive way, seriously impassable for my 15 seater van, meant I was not going in there to be with him. The fact that the kids were asleep and I had left the baby seat in the 4WD were of little consequence as my mummy dear lives very close and she could have come to watch the kids.

'OK call me when you get into a room if the morphine hasn't kicked in to much by then OK?'

'Yeah'

'Do you want me to come in?'

'Nah'

'Have they given you something for the pain yet?'

'Yeah'

'Ok so you are all good then?'

'Yeah'

By that stage I realised he was in no pain and the whole conversation would be pointless from that point on so I said my goodbyes and stayed awake worrying till I fell asleep much later. On waking I rang the hospital as he was not answering his phone.

No record of him on the patients list so they put me  through to the ER no reports of him being there. OK I thought DO NOT PANIC. I would have been called if something serious had occurred. Take deep breaths. He is probably at his mums asleep,he couldn't drive home after all. Finally he answered his phone. He was fine still in a lot of pain but fine and would be home soon.

When he arrived the kids ran out to find out about his hospital visit ooohing and ahhhhing over his wrist band and the three round Band Aids that showed where the drip and needles had gone.

'What did you eat?' asked Miss Thinker

'Nothing'

'Well then thats why you had to go to hospital, the starving people always have to go to hospital dad'

That brought My Beloved on to the topic of my cooking.

'The doctor said I have to quit smoking.'

'Good! Thank you ulcer!' Big Miss said

'You will die if you smoke you know dad' Miss Independent added

'I will die if mum doesn't start to cook less crap food' My Beloved joked

'Um what?' I said

'Less processed stuff so no more take out stuff, more veges and no more packet stuff' he said smiling he knows me too well.

'What ever, there is nothing wrong with my cooking thankyou very bloody much!'

'Dont worry mum just dont make anything yummy for him and give it all to us' Miss Thinker said

'I might not ever feed him again.' I said to her 'but it is true daddy has to eat differently which means mum has to make dinners with more vegetables than anything else, it is  healthier anyway I said.


So there you have it, our bad news, No smoking, No drinking AT ALL for My Beloved and the most tragic news of all I HAVE TO START COOKING FROM SCRATCH AGAIN...... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!




Update: Since starting this post four hours ago I have spent three of those hours keeping a close eye on My Beloved as I didn't take his medicine off him straight away and he decided that the instructions ONE tablet TWICE a day didn't apply to him and as his pain was getting worse he would have a THIRD tablet. Since then I have Googled very sparingly (as we all now what happens when you Google an illness dont we)what happens when you take too much of his particular medication his killer headache and dry mouth is a result of too much of his medicine...No sleep for me tonight. And a BIG plate of brussels sprouts for My Beloved for dinner tomorrow night! He wants lots of veges? He'll get em!

Sorting out the lounge/dining Part 1

We are still building our house. And we will still be building it when Big Miss and the Man Child leave home (which if they are like their parents really is gonna happen very soon).We will still be building when they try to ship us off to an old peoples home too I'd say. 

The offending Wall

There is always something else to do. From simple things like a new paint colour to the larger knock down/build up a wall or two. And when you can do it yourself it isn't a 'yeah if only we could' it is a 'yeah if only we can agree'.


 I have my ideas of what looks good and My Beloved does too. Only once has his idea gained my full approval and the rest of the time he does it anyway, it is his house too I guess, and later whether months or weeks later it is knocked down or painted over.

Notice the cornicing? The floor
is still waiting for tiles... wont be
long though.

This wall for example MUST go. I have half painted it white... Yes half. But have since decided it has to go. I can not fit my big 3 seater and 2 seater lounges and my big table in the space left over because of it. It also hides the fire place and another door which lets in soooo much morning light. 


Trouble is though My Beloved thinks it is a 'good' spot for it.So I have to argue with him OR just buy the tiles for the floor so that he HAS to knock it down (see the trick is to make it seem like it is his idea) and I know once the tiles are here that wall will come down so fast it will surprise even me.


And HOPEFULLY we wont, once the tiles are down build anymore walls in the vicinity of the lounge/dining again... but you never can say never around here!

Housework How I Hate You

Housework is something you do that nobody notices until you don't do it. 

There is one thing I hate more than anything else in the domestic arena and that is doing the pointless. House work seems to fall into that catorgory to me. YES I know it has to be done and Yes it is easy when you keep on top of  it but what if you dont? In a large family keeping on top of it doen't mean the same as when there is only two or three kids. 'Keeping on top of it' means CONSTANTLY walking around picking up wiping down and rocking backwards and forwards going to a happy place.


So what happens when you don't. For what ever reason be it sickness, new baby, pure exhaustion or just totally couldn't be bothered. I'll tell you shall I? A massive depressing mess occurs. Where quite frankly it doesn't matter if you have just finished doing the 'deep clean' or the 'sweep it under the rug' kind. If you are not there keeping on top of it and the family is home you got a mess on your hands.


Now I know some women with many who are so perfect at keeping house there are times I don't know if I admire them or wish they had a 'bad day' just to prove they are human. Those women are my heroes! Yes I have even heard of some kids that are little neat freaks (their mums are the ones above) and i want some!


 But most are just typical kids doing 'kid things' like making a sandwich and leaving the half empty can of tuna,the butter (sometimes if your lucky with the lid on), the several knives used in the butter, the can opener in a pool of oil from attempting to open the tuna, salt and pepper on the bench. Or after changing into their millionth outfit change that day clothes all over the bedroom floor (or through the entire house depending on the child).


Then there are the bedrooms... Oh where do you start? I start but fighting the urge to turn my head to the sky whilst bellowing 'Whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhy?'
That doesn't help you get it done... unfortunantly. If you don't keep on top of it things get out of control quickly. Even husbands(and My Beloved is a very good help around the house) can leave a mess about. But then so can I. 


I have a dumping area, right now it is the dining table (the kids use the island bench for meals). It gets cleared off and filled up again depending on how serious I am taking the 'keeping on top of it' thing, which of late is half heartedly I must say. Between Littlest Miss, trips into town, child related stuff my cupboard sorting and everything else and that human need to sleep I am starting to get to the point of no return. Gotta 'Supermum' it up. Or, in the words of Pink I could 'just burn this sucker down!' 


On a positive note, the GREAT thing about a large family is when you have not kept on top of it all a simple 'All hands on deck' gets the job done in no time. We really are lucky!

I have feelings too you know, Emma

A month ago I saw a sale, two T shirts for fifteen dollars. Bargain.  I'd buy two for My Beloved. I found the perfect two and I was very happy with them. He came home from three night shifts driving taxis in a row and I bombarded him with them when he walked in the door. 

'Yes I like them' he said.

'I thought you would' 

I mentally patted myself on the back. It isn't often he likes the things I buy him. You've done it, he does like it! Oh yes it is sad when you are congratulating yourself on such things but oh well.

Two days later we were off to town. As he walked into the bathroom he asked me to get him something to wear. Naturally I got him a T shirt. He got dressed and was standing in front of the mirror when I came in.

'So do you like it?' I asked noticing it was a smidgen tight but just a smidgen. 

'It's a bit tight don't you think?'

 Now being the sort of person you do not specifically ask for their opinion unless you are prepared for it, come what may. I figured he had noticed the only thing about the shirt that didn't look great.

'I know what you're thinking' I said 'It is a bit tight in the chest. You're worried you can see your man boobs. But you cant' 

'Um. No.' he said with a bit of a laugh 'I wasn't thinking that at all. Do i have man boobs?' 

'No not really, I just thought because it is a bit tight around the chest... well it isn't even really tight. It looks perfect from the back.'

'So I should walk around backwards all day?' he joked.

 (This must be how men feel when asked by their wives or girlfriends if they look good I thought) I laughed my best oh your so funny and sexy laugh... it seemed to work. 

We finally managed to get into town. My comment forgotten (by me at least).

'I am just going to get a haircut.' he told me as he walked off. 

'Ok I'll be here.' I said.

20 minuets passed and he came back.

'

'Oh good.' I said 'Lets go. It is getting hot'.

 As we walked back towards our car, he pushing the pram and me carrying a wriggling two year old who seemed to want to play chicken with the odd car.  

He  said 'So what do you think?' 

I would have realised by the smile on his face. if i was not so busy with Mr Cheeky. that a positive response was not really optional but mandatory instead I missed it and said.

'It's OK. But it looks a bit crap so flat on your head.'

'I thought you liked  this style?' he said ruffling his hair. I still didn't pick up on it.

'It is a nice length and everything, I just think you should brush it back. It looks stupid all flat.'

'I got the hairdresser to style like this because you said you liked it like that.' 

Finally I picked up on it. A few years earlier when the 'Julius Caesar' style haircut was fashionable I had my aunt cut his hair and she did that style cut.  I had raved about it. It did look good, but what he had was not the same. So keeping that bit of information to myself I said 

'Run your fingers through it.' he did.              

'That looks better. Just needed a little bit of body. It is the perfect length for you.'

 The trick is to not go too overboard on the compliments. Otherwise they would have the opposite effect. So I proceeded to, over the course of the day, suggest that he was quite possibly THE most sexiest man IN the world bar absolutely no one not EVEN Johnny Depp ( and he knows what I think about Johnny Depp).

Finally, by the time the kids were all in bed I realised I had done it. I had managed to heal the bruised ego!

PHEW!

'

In completely related news: He brushes his hair back  and he is the sexiest man in the world, except MAYBE Johnny Depp.

Say What?

 I figure there are things mothers or fathers of large families would like people out there to know. I have read some good 'ranting' posts about this as well as funny 'Top Ten' style posts on this same subject and you will find whilst there may be some differences. There are some universal pet hates. So here I go!

We don't consider how many children you have or don't have as any of our business, why do you consider how many we have as any of yours?

 We don't ask you about when you're planing to 'stop' having children (or start for that matter!) Why do you ask us?

 Is it because your brain stopped functioning after you had children that you assume we are all of below level intelligence? (Yes! You don't have to say it!)

 Yes we do know whats causing it and WE LOVE IT!!

 No we are NOT bad for the environment. What an absolutely stooooooooopid concept. For a number of reasons. (and DO NOT get me started on population control)  That is a prime exsample of 'keep it to yourself' right there. Sell your crazy elsewhere as we are full up with crazy on this side of the fence.

Yes we do have a T.V.   

If we are out and about could you try not to look at us as though the circus is in town? It is a little offensive. Try to imagine instead it is good old Brad and Angie and ooooh and ahhhhh (oh hang i said as if the circus wasn't in town.)

 The chances are that our kids are better behaved than yours, O.K  maybe not as quiet as there are MORE. Obviously, there are large families with out of control brats but  I'll go out on a limb here and say there are just as many 1,2 or 3 kid families with brats.

My personal fave and some other mothers too is the good old 'do they have the same father?'

 It might surprise you that quite often they do or the same father but different mothers if you take second marriages into account. Yes there are some large families where there are three or more fathers but ditto with smaller ones.

I was once asked AND I QUOTE  'Do they still see ALL their FATHERS' my reply to that was a genuine laugh and a big smile and a simple 'yes, they live with HIM'  (as in my particular case it was the most ridiculous question i have ever been asked and not QUITE the most insulting) Really people, that is just plain rude!

 No. Not all of us are of any particular religious or spiritual persuasion. Some large families are, and so what?

 One of the most dumbfounding comments I have ever heard was said to another mother of 7. She was accused of being selfish because there are others out there that can not have children. Which is true and my heart aches for them. But unless this mother is stealing others babies, I really don't think it is logical that her family size is the reason others can not conceive. - RUDE and STUPID!

Now that little bit there may have offended and if it did it was not my intention, much like I hope the comment made to that mother of seven was not meant to offend.

 "How many do you have now?'

One reply I saw to that statement of 'how many does that make it' (or words to that effect) was from a father of 7 who said ' 7 because 8 would be stupid' I have used that in response to two similar questions. I love it.

Now don't get your knickers in a knot if you have said some of these things and think 'but I was not being rude' (Though some of you were AND you know it) we know that in most cases it isn't your fault you just don't understand we hear that all the time. It isn't funny to us, it is nice you are taking an interest I suppose. But try to think of something else to say like you would or would not to a complete stranger! Like, 'what lovely kids' or nothing if they are not so lovely.

 No they are not missing out on the important things in life, unless you consider material things as important. Yes not all large families can afford every new gadget out there. Some can and do, some can and don't, some can't and do, some cant and therefore don't. But in MOST cases they have more people who love them, more people to lay down their life for them, more presents, more help... Just more.

As for quality time, notice I said quality? Mothers of many usually are more mindfull of quality time then those with one or two. We have to be, we worry about our childrens problems,hopes and dreams just like you do with yours. Did you spend less quality time with your child because you had another? Chances are you didn't. Chances are you were more mindfull.We are the same. Yes of course there are exceptions to the rule. There always is.

We are people too. We like to speak to adults sometimes. So when we go out we usually fall into 1 of 2 catergories those that spend the entire time worry about how our children are behaving and constantly keeping an eye on them because we, like you, dont like the idea of people thinking badly of our kids and unfortunantly the more you have the more people read into it when a child from a large family does misbehave in some way.

Then there is the other catergory, the parents that are happy to be socialising,it is probably the only time they have been out this century and are making the most of it. They know where there kids are and they are happy to let them go for it and have fun enjoying the company of other kids.Without running after them. So try to be mindfull of that. I tend to fall into the first catergory. But it depends on the occassion.

 There are more but I think you get the drift. I didn't mean for this to turn into lecture, which I fear it has but hey, thats life!

Follow this link to see a video of a family with 6 kiddies singing in the tune to the twelve days of christmas about other comments that those of us with big families can relate to.

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DxaD8xat6VDw&h=KAQHpyP2KAQFO7CPnZ6PH01I-BWY9IF5Qo73FLol77seFBw

4 Wheel Driving & Towing for girls - The Basics

  4 Wheel Driving & Towing for Girls

Being married to my own personal camping and 4WDriving  pro (in the sense  he has done it all his life not the 'I went and did a course' kinda way) has its benefits. One of them being I have learnt through the years how to 4wd without really knowing it and anything I have not picked up The Man Child knows.

I used my newly realised skills yesterday. My sister who, I shall call Sezzy, went furniture shopping down the coast. She hired a Trailer and brought home couches and footstools gorgeous free standing kitchen bench and bookcases.She arrived home late and got herself bogged trying to get the trailer in to a prime' carrying in furniture' position. I was roped into going and getting Sezzy out of the muck.

  I was scared. I hadn't towed anyone out before, thats what my husband is for. A million things ran through my head. Is the snatch rope in the car? How exactly do you lock the hubs in? Do you in fact lock the hubs in or is that for non 4wd? What happens if the snatch rope flies off the back of my car flinging into the windscreen of Sezzy's killing her on impact? Hey better safe than sorry! 

The hubs are 'in'. The arrow on the top is
pointing to Lock.

The hubs need to be locked. On the front of the wheel you see (once all the dirt has been wiped away) a 'twisty turny thing' right in the middle. Which is in fact the hub itself. There is an arrow on one end and as long as the arrow is pointed at 'lock' and not 'free' the hubs are now in and you can 4WD. You change it back to 'free' when you have finished your 4WD fun.

The snatch rope. One end
hooks over the tow hitch
the other end on the tow
bar of the car pulling you
out. It all seems so easy.

What I call the tow hitch of
my Nissan Patrol. However
your car may be different (as
long as it is sturdy it is fine).

It turns out there really is nothing to it. Yes a snatch rope helps, but a rope of any kind is sufficient. You must hook said rope onto something sturdy like the tow hitch (a U shaped bit of metal under the front and possibly the back of the car) You should use a special knot if using rope so the tension does not tighten it to the point you cant get it off. I don't know any knots apart from the granny knot. See link on how to make the knot needed. It is called a Bowline knot

http://www.wikihow.com/Tie-a-Bowline-Knot

Do Not I repeat Do Not hook or tie on to things like the plastic of the car (like the bumper) or radiator etc. After attaching the other end to your tow bar you are good to go. You must drive forwards slowly allowing the rope between you both to become taught THEN you tow them out the initial jerk or tug you feel is a good sign. You are starting to pull them out so keep going. Keep the revs of the engine steady. Don't go too fast and don't stop until they are out of the boggy bit.

A slightly related Story:

It is common with the men in my husbands family to take each others hubs 'out' when 4WDriving. Everyone is in on it except the person driving that particular car. When the said person gets bogged, usually the one who has been bragging about how great their car brand is compared to the others, everyone else proceeds to laugh and comment on how terrible the car is. It usually takes a few minuets for the person to figure it out. I have seen the victim of this 4WD joke be left to dig their tyres out and then get towed out of the spot before someone has walked up to the front wheels and put the hubs 'in' allowing them to also call into question their 4WDriving skills and mental capacity.

Missed Opportunity

It is 4:33am on a Thursday morning and I am awake. It is nice and quiet but I wish I hadn't collapsed into bed so early last night. Not because I am awake so early. But because I missed that opportunity to be awake with NO-ONE harassing me.

Let me explain. My Beloved is still taking a group of backpackers on a three day Fraser Island camping trip. (He is great with all things camping in a kind of Alby Mangles way.) My four big girls are sleeping over at my mums, towards the end of last year it became a bit of a routine where most Thursdays they would get off the bus and spend the night).



Mr Cheeky and Littlest Miss went to sleep by 6:00.(In the case of Mr Cheeky a wondrous miracle, probably never to occur again) Which just left my Man Child, who was quietly taking apart a speaker system from what I hope wasn't a working item when I saw him last which was at 7 maybe 7:30pm last night.

It has occurred to me that by falling asleep so early I missed at least five hours of quiet time,catch up on washing time (this rain is killing me) of reading time,of personal beautifying time (looooooong over due)  of doing any number of the millions of things a woman/mother/human being has to do.


I could have done some baking,craft,writing,rearranging hell, even some exercise... O.K so that ones pushing it, but you know what I mean.

Our love story is my favorite

Our Love Story


 It started 18 years ago. The short story goes exactly like this:


Love at first sight, We both decided we were meant for each other before we had even met.


We saw each other about two years before we REALLY saw each other.  He was fixing his car at the local store, I was prank calling some one at the public phone box. (Kids if you are reading this ignore that bit OK!)  


He remembers this because I was busted as a prank caller and had loudly defended myself to the poor harassed individual. I was with two friends and I do remember seeing two 'guys' leaning under the hood of a car. But not much else.


TWO YEARS LATER


HIS Version: I was working on my car (yes,he did that a lot) and I looked up and saw you and your friend walking up the road. You looked like what I imagined my 'wife' would look like when I was a kid.You had those sexy pink shorts on (don't worry it is G rated) and I thought I would marry you. Well that and other things.


MY Version: I was working in my mothers salon and happened to look out the window as he drove past in his Rambler Matador X (read big red yank tank) all I saw of him was his side profile as he drove past. I thought I am going to marry him. I didn't know where he lived or who he was but I was certain of it.


I then, as you do decided to find out who he was, where he lived and 'make him mine'. I soon learnt that I went to school with his sister and to make things even more exciting he lived literally two houses up from mine (1/2 a km maybe even less) 

SEE GORGEOUS!!!

I made friends with his sister shortly after, now I must clarify that his sister would have been my friend anyway had I have spoken to her before seeing him. I just happen to be the sort of person who does not start talking to people willy nilly, yes even people i live two doors down from and am on a school bus with for at least and hour and a half every weekday. Take from that what you will.


Naturally I visited her often. She is great fun and we had a great time but there was of course an added benefit. Her brother was freaking GORGEOUS and I was on a mission... eventually we were 'going out' and were both very happy about that. By September of that year he had told me he loved me THEN I told him I loved him too (I mean you don't just go in there declaring your love to people left, right and centre now do you.)


A year had passed and I found out I was pregnant. Quite dramatic for me at the time but he was excited about it and after being given the option to run screaming in the opposite direction he decided he was not( as i told him  'I am keeping my baaaaaaybeeeeee') and we decided to move to Brisbane, well I decided we were moving to Brisbane. 


I'll save the rest of that story for later. After ten years together living in sin with our 3 'bastard' children (again kids if you're reading this you know I mean born out of wedlock ) we married and had our honeymoon baby Alannah nine months four days later give or take a day or two. Followed buy 3 more 'legitimate' children. 

** Updated 26th June 2010 **

We still have not had a Honeymoon and one day we plan too. But until then we will continue as we always have, loving each other like crazy (with odd moments of me wishing I hadn't decided to 'hunt him down' and he wishing he didn't admire my pink shorts so much).

'Things really are gonna change around here.'

Today I realised that some of my 7LittleAustralians could be a little better behaved. Not with others... but with me.  There was what some would consider total chaos erupting here by 5pm (though just a meal around here could be considered chaos to some) and there really looked like there was no end in sight. 

After having to speak to 3 girls repetitively I decided (as I often do) that 'things were gonna change around here'. Instead of yelling it in a desperate attempt to actually believe it myself, I decided it quietly and said nothing. I calmly waited for Miss Independent, Miss Thinker and Little Miss to finish throwing the handfuls of mud they had in their hands after I had just said to stop and come inside.

 I waited five minuets, something that is not really acceptable to me. My main rule is when I say something do it (obviously they are also told that if someone tells you to do something that is wrong don't do it no matter who says it. So you can be assured I am not building an army of robots up in here ;p). 

'Get in the bath' I said as they came running through the house covered in mud, giggling shrilly. Seeing that I was not impressed they quietened down till out of my sight in the bathroom and continued to laugh and push each other whilst splashing the water all over the floor. Lately my response to this would be yelling. 'Don't splash water on the floor!' Do I look like I want to clean your mess?' What the hell is wrong with you? e.t.c  e.t.c

Instead I stood there waiting for them to notice me. They did very quickly (possibly because the vibe in the room was  kinda like mums coming and hell's coming with her). Three pairs of eyes looked at me uncertain through the mud. 

'You're all going to bed after you have eaten.' was all I said and walked out. 

The bathroom remained quiet. Meanwhile I went about dinner, a special early one just for them. They came out clean and dressed quietly at first then started to get bolder and louder and than just plain noisy! Once again I resisted the urge to go in all guns blazing in an effort to make more noise then they.

'Dinner is ready girls'

Some time passed before they came out fighting about who was sitting where and who was eating from which plate. When they finished they put their plates in the sink.

'Give me a kiss. Brush your teeth. Go to the toilet and get into bed' I said,

 Miss Independent started sulking and crying, her favorite fall back. Little Miss started to act as though her life could possibly end if forced into bed at that hour.

 Miss Thinker said 'Oh you were serious? I didn't think you really were mum'.

'Very'

'Oooops O.K then'

All three got into bed very quickly, though Miss Independent's tears kept flowing.I sat down on each girls bed and told them that from now on when I asked them to do something I wanted it done straight away, that when they made a mess they would be cleaning it straight away, that when I said jump into bed not another sound would be heard. 

It used to be like that until I managed some how to stop following through with my 'threats' and now as a result I seem to be yelling an awful lot. 

Consistency is the key. So here's to hoping I can get back into the old routine and things actually do change around here!

In unrelated news: My Beloved is off at Fraser Island escorting tourists around and camping.The good news is he now has a new V8 Cruiser as his car and he is very proud of himself. I am sure in three days time when he is back he will tell me all about it, and, if it is at all interesting I shall share it with you.

Hey I did say it was unrelated!